To preface this, I like my boyfriend’s sister, we get along well and I’ve been with my boyfriend for 5 years.
My boyfriend (34M) is about to be on the market for a new car, his car is 10 years old and starting to have some costly issues. I just paid $3000 to get it out of the shop. This got us on the topic of getting a new car. His sister (age not specified) mentioned she’s paying $605 a month on a 7 year loan term… (the car outright is 24k) i thought to myself that’s a terrible decision on her part but I didn’t say what I was thinking to her.
This is where my boyfriend says I’m the asshole. Today while my boyfriend and I were discussing the car situation. I told him if he can’t comfortably afford a 5 year loan term or less he cannot afford the car he wants.
The car he wants is around 45k. He was thinking he was going to take out a 7 yr loan on it so he could afford the payments. I told him flat out that was a REALLY stupid idea.
I tried to explain to him why a 7 year loan term is a really bad idea, especially on a used car. I explained that the interest rates are much higher on long term loans because they’re deemed high risk. I used his sister’s loan as an example.
I told him your sister is going to spend 50k on a 24k car because she took out a 7 yr loan with high interest. I said that’s an insanely stupid decision. It’s not my place to tell her I think she made a dumb decision but I told him between the two of us, it wasn’t very smart. So I’m not letting him make the same dumb decision.
He got mad at me and said “so you’re calling me and my sister stupid” I said I don’t think your sister is a stupid person but I do think she made a stupid financial decision. I’d think you’re stupid for wanting to do the same thing.
He basically called me an asshole and gave me the silent treatment for a while.
The Unexpected Twist: After that argument, I happened to talk to a mutual friend who knew a bit about his sister’s situation. The friend sighed and said, “Yeah, [Sister’s Name]’s loan? It’s bad. But it was her only option. She needed a new car immediately because her old one completely died right after [mention another unexpected, costly event that happened to the sister, e.g., an emergency medical bill, a major housing issue]. She had no savings. She tried getting a loan from banks, from family… but no one would lend to her. That high-interest 7-year loan was the only place she got approved, and she needed the car to get to work. It was a terrible financial decision, but it was the only one she could make to keep her job and stay afloat.”
So.. AITA for saying him & his sister are stupid??